Is Naked the New Uber Sexy?

sexuality, sex blogs, sex , erotica female, erotica

“Your shirt or sexy lingerie?,” I text My Favorite Scorpio.  Honestly, the men in my life have it so difficult.  I ask them the most point blank sexual questions about men and their perceptions of women.  Then, I stand back innocently expecting an answer.

Of course, the great thing is that the few men that are really close enough to me to encounter this triad of personally evasive questions seem to love to share the answers. 

“No question.  My shirt,” his answer buzzed back almost immediately.  To say I was surprised by this response is not accurate.  See…I asked because I have my sneaking suspicions.  The Marine has always loved naked instead of his shirt (I think that is a laundry issue!) or sexy lingerie.  He tells me it has something to do with ruining the mood when he has to figure out complicated hooks and fasteners.  Ok, I can understand that.  To be fair, the fasteners on my garters confuse my mind and aggravate my sexual soul too.  For the men in the audience that believe a bra without a front closure should be banned from the face of the sexual surface of the earth, a corset can be more than a heart can stand.

However, what did strike me as odd was not only the number of men that I asked who reported that sexy lingerie did not turn them on, but I started to notice something completely particular.  Even the greater catalogs that build their sexy reputation on scantily clad women in the widow maker, high heels, and stockings, the stuff masturbation dreams are made for young boys suffering from puberty in a small bathroom; do not offer sexy lingerie as a product anymore. 

Enter Victoria’s Secrets.  If you have perused a VS catalog lately or been into one of their stores, you might notice a suspicious absence of the hallmark of their earliest existence:  sexy lingerie.  Now they focus mostly on bras, panties, and scents.  I would like to say that the switch is a matter of women understanding that sexy is what is inside.  In reality, I think that it is more a matter of women not believing the mythology anymore that you have to be sexy on someone else’s terms.  Or, is it a matter of men, growing up in the TV / Internet generation, with sexual ADD?

Or…is it? 

  • If men find that a t-shirt and pretty panties are a turn on, then are we still experiencing sexuality on our own terms?
  • Does wearing his t-shirt give him a feeling of comfortable sexual ownership or possession (not judging that as wrong…just questioning the world!)?
  • If women accept that the shift in Victoria’s Secrets represents what women want to wear to feel sexy, then why are we paying amazing prices for an uncomfortable bra, panties that remind me to floss every morning (if you need an explanation…then you should enjoy a thong for a few hours!), and a collection of body scents that could send you running for the allergist?

So…here is what I want…from each of you that reads this rant of sexuality!  Yeah yeah…I do mean YOU!  I want to know…what turns you (or your significant other) on?   Really…enquiring minds want to know… Sexy Lingerie, his (my) shirt, or nothing at all?

Get going!  Please and thank you.  ~~Dee

18 thoughts on “Is Naked the New Uber Sexy?

  1. I would say he tended to go with what matched my mood. If I was feeling particularly aggressive, his shirt (and sometimes tie) always got a great response. If I was more in the seductive, come-here-big-boy mood, he liked the lingerie (either a nightie that covered quite a bit but definitely alluded to more or bra and panties). If I was in the I’m-so-sexy-there’s-no-way-you-can-resist-me mood, I drifted more towards nothing at all.

    Hmm – I think I associate mood with apparel (or lack thereof) as much as he did.

  2. Julia–There is an epiphany! It makes sense that we pick our day clothes according to mood. I know that I pick my shoes according to the “outcome” I wish to promote. If I feel agressive, then it is probably high heel boots. If I feel seductive, it is peep-toe high heels. But, I know I have a thing for high heels…they make me feel sexually powerful! ~~Dee

  3. My Princess–Yes…those damn hooks mean that the sex better be outstanding! 3.5 hours of admiration and lots of great food / wine are necessary! Not needed! Necessary!!! ~~Dee

  4. Kitty–I DEMAND a recount! *snort* Sorry…just practicing for Tuesday. Oddly, in all the men and women I asked, they seem to be soooo over the sexy lingerie trend. MAYBE…it is an age thing (I know you are much younger than me! *kiss kiss kiss!*). Not sure what the differences might be. ~~Dee

  5. My opinion is somewhat tainted as I was in the exotic business for many years (dj). So what I find sexy may not be what the average guy does. I do not get turned on by lingerie or costumes, and boots are a big turn off actually. What I do find very sexy are long sweaters and shirts, and t-shirts slung down over one shoulder is waYY good. Sexy panties and thongs are never a bad thing, but ladies if you don’t have an ass for a thong, please don’t. But most of all for me, sexy is all in the attitude.

  6. Sean–Welcome! Actually, many in this part of the blogosphere have experience in some type of exotic / erotic business. So…your opinions are as valuable as anyone else. Although, as some men love the ladies with the big booty, I say wear what you love love love. As a lady with the an ass a man can appreciate as healthy 😉 I say…find the man that love the big butt girl and appreciate all over each other! Because in truth, you are very right. It is all attitude and I have seen some knock your socks off round women! My favorite is his LSU shirt. Now, I better be ready for the game when I slip that shirt on! ~~Dee

  7. Now, if you would have added thigh high or high heeled to that

    Heh – sorry, I figured that some things just went without saying.

    I had a lover that used to wear my shirts – unbuttoned, of course. That was sexy.

    I had a lover who used to have a whole closet full of “outfits.” That was sexy.

    I had a lover who used to walk around monstly naked. That was sexy.

    More than the clothes, my favorite lovers always acted *interested* in me. That was sexy!

  8. Tom–Of course, high heels…and The Marine corrected me at dinner with “stilletto thigh high leather boots”…and leave them on. That seems to be the part that most women miss. Its not in the clothes that you do or dont put on your body that makes us sexy…its about the way you tingle for him that sparks that flame. I think that is confidence and trust in ourselves….and, it might, I hope, come with age. Past the point where we are worried about a few pound and feel comfortable wanting that one certain man that makes you breath hard…even when he is not around. Maybe….women learn passion once we get past our other hang ups. ~~Dee

  9. Hi Sexy (ok…I love saying that!). I want to note that I counted your vote, but removed your link because you own a lingerie store. So…it would be like voting against yourself (not sure of the validity of that!)…which is not smart. Thank you for stopping by though…please wander by again. ~~Dee

  10. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! OH!!!! (sorry, it’s been a while so I got a little over eager..hee.hee..)

    I forgot to note –most of the men (and a few ladies) that I spoke to had one VERy common agreement. The lingerie known as “Baby Doll nighties”?? **NOT SEXY**

    Nope, 9 out of 10 sexy people said that Baby Doll’s were the worst lingerie ever dreamed up when it came to sexy bedroom clothing. The only people whom I spoke to that actually liked the Baby Dolls were a few women and they said it was because it gave them a sense of modesty (more cover up). Ummm… sexy lingerie isn’t meant for modesty purposes!!

    Oh..and sweet! Someone agrees with me! Yay me. ha..ha.ha.. 😀

  11. Kitty–Yes…the babydoll is alittle old school with the Huge Hefner 50’s kind of sexuality. When it was slutty to show skin…even in the bedroom! Plus, I think it feeds into alittle fetish of women treated like little girls by their daddy (some Freud in there somewhere!).

    Yes…the owner of a lingerie website agreed with you. I posted that just for my “Pet the Pussy” campaign. Glad you appreciate it! 😉 ~~Dee

  12. ggrrr … after being up most of the night letting my fingers do the walking with a long distance … “conversation” … i have to read this!!! oh gad!!

    what do i feel sexy in … a tank top and surprisingly my victoria secret jammie pants … or a t shirt, his or mine and a pair of boy short panties

    what do i find sexy on him … me!! lol!! oh you meant clothes, huh … uum … yeah …. can’t think of anything right now … other than me!

    i think that the guys that like the t shirt thing like the fact that the person wearing is comfortable and confident enough to wear it around them and that is turn on

  13. TG–Hold up now…Aural sex can be the bomb! Warm and creamy and VERY dreamy! I love the tank top and VS jammie bottoms. Make me feel like a big, lazy cat purring in the sun. I do think that no matter what we wear (or dont)–confidence is the key! ~~Dee

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