I have encountered a rather interesting phenomenon that I simply cannot explain. So many women…upon meeting and talking to me tell me what a (put positive adjective here) person that I am. They rave about how great it is to know me, how much they can count on me to have their back, and how strong I am as a person/woman/individual. Ok…that is all good. But, what I don’t understand is that upon getting a little closer to me, each woman finds things about my physical appearance that they feel like they want to change.
Now, really…I am not unattractive at all. In some places, I am even considered quite pretty. I believe I have amazing features that reflect the best of who I am. Given, I am not receptive to many of the trappings of most women (ie. makeup, pedicures, waxing, and wonder bras) because I don’t consider those things important to the experience of being a sexual woman. They are about the external…not so much the internal…and the enhancement of the prettiness of the body. So, when faced with the recent rash of women saying things to me about wanting to “make me over” or “dress me up,” I fall short of understanding why.
- What do they see as missing when they look at me?
- Why do they feel like I am lacking a part of my being if I am not participating in these rituals?
- How can they like the internal so much and not see the connection to my comfort with the external?
Please, don’t get me wrong. These things are not said to me with any maliciousness at heart. They are wonderful women seeking to help me. But, what they fail to understand is that I am not in need of help. Life is not about the decorations that others see when they sit across the table from me. My life is about what I see when I look in the mirror…and I like that woman…and it shows in my sexual soul. If my body is comfortable in a pair of skin tight jeans with high heels and a sexy tank top, then that is more sexually powerful than a short skirt with thigh high fishnet stockings with a lacy top that I see women constantly tugging back into place. Because I am able to wear confidence and self-esteem, it will never matter what else I wear…I will wear it well and that is what reflects into the sexually adjusted woman that I am. ~~Dee (not Barbie)