“I am easily satisfied with the very best.”–Winston Churchill
“You know what your problem is?” Anytime a conversation starts this way, there are two things I know someone is about to tell me.
Something I don’t really want to hear and it is usually based on an outside, possibly remote observation, of my behavior. Interestingly enough…this sentence always piques my interest because I have spent over 30 years trying to find my “problem.”
“You problem is that you just don’t like women.” I was silent in shock. I wanted to laugh, but he was so serious.
No, quite the contrary, I like women well enough to make them my mission in life. I like women well enough to want to empower every single one with the strength of their own sexuality. I like women well enough to care if even one wakes up in the morning feeling insignificant or small in her world. I like women well enough to feel pain when just one struggles with her existence or cowers when she needs to be strong.
It is easily confused, I suppose, because I expect so much more out of women than I do from men. I expect a higher degree of humanity and natural intelligence. I expect women to care about each other with a deeper level of compassion and to lend a hand when needed to make other women stronger. Instead of picking teams in an “us vs. them” mentality so popular in high school, I expect us to admire the best in each other and understand the worst.
Yes, I like women just fine…but, with all that I expect….the very best of each one of them, they don’t tend to like me. I am way too honest and transparent. I openly discuss my own shortcomings easily. So, I get picked last for all of the girlie teams… I dont do make up sessions or long chats on the phone. I dont gossip over morning coffee or cut another woman down for a choice that has nothing to do with me. I wont revel in the pain of another woman or down grade her talents…even if I dont like her.
And, I will never forget for a second what it feels like to be left out of the group.
As long as I look in the mirror and see the person that I want to see, I am learning to be ok with that part of loving myself as well as encourage the best in other women. ~~Dee