Women and Sex: Taming the Animal

sex sex blogs erotica female erotica“The American woman is the only woman that gets married to become a virgin.”

This is from a movie that I saw one TV recently.  It is not a direct quote because the movie was not so impressive, but the statement has stayed with me for weeks.  This statement came back to me again when a friend asserted that women use sex to control a relationship.  I pondered.  I tried to deny that…I really did, but I could not quite get there!

The question that I am trying to resolve in my mind is “why?”  Why are we trying to control the men in our lives?  Yes, they are men…and that can be VERY disagreeable to logic and rational behavior sometimes!  But why try to control or change them?

I think that it has something to do with female insecurity with sexuality.  I mean, if we are happy with someone when we take them on as a partner, then does the unhappiness come from later discovering that he is not the person we thought he was?  And then, rather than go through the pain of trying to change him into the person he “should” be with the giving or withholding of sexual favors, why not find someone else who more suits our mood, style, or taste?

I know…most women will give me a speech about how it is easier to fix what is broken than find someone new.  But, in reality, it really is not easier!  You are investing tons of energy in changing another human being and loosing your sexuality in the process because when you input negative energy into anything—you can not get a positive result that makes you happy.

Plus, it is about making me happy, as well as, my partner.  He can’t be happy not being who he is anymore than I would be not being who I am!

I believe that women use sex as a weapon because it is the only way that we feel we can control an unequal situation.  But…there really is another way.  One with more pride and less self esteem loss. 

Not long left until Valentines Day!  Enter to win the OhMiBod Vibrator Giveaway !  ~~Dee

10 thoughts on “Women and Sex: Taming the Animal

  1. I found your site on technorati and read a few of your other posts. Keep up the good work. I just added your RSS feed to my Google News Reader. Looking forward to reading more from you. Allen

  2. I can only tell you of my past and my present ~Dee~. My past involved a man who *wanted* me to control him. Who wanted me to be in charge…and obviously that didn’t work out.

    My present — I’m working very hard at NOT being that way. At being adaptable, more relaxed, and definitely more open about discussing things….clearly and concisely..

    Case in point — Drummer Boy last night — as we were kissing, I started to giggle (I can’t help it!) and he got concerned.. asked what it was.. I smiled and said (very kindly) that he was doing something a bit “odd” with his tongue… he was quite taken aback by that and replied “I’ve never had anyone tell me that I don’t kiss well”… to which I replied .. “Well.. not to your face, maybe”.. ha..ha.ha……

    The good news — he took that as a challenge and not an insult. 🙂

  3. Randi–Ahhhh….Oral sex is such a force! Enjoyed so rarely by women (I believe because they do not feel comfortable admitting that they love oral sex–not socially acceptable!). Good for you girlie! ~~Dee

  4. Dee, you know what I think it is? Wait….by the way i cant wait for margaritas with you. Ok here are my two cents. And I know there is going to be at least one person who will disagree with me. So here it goes.

    Being that women are made differently we desire things that some men dont see. And to get what we want we may punish the other person. Think of it as kids being punished. They dont clean their room you take away their toys. And when they get it back they take better care of it.

    I think thats what it is.

    Now do I agree with it? No I dont.

  5. MissM–I agree. I think there is a degree of punishment for not doing what we want. I, personally, dont want a lap dog. I have dogs that kneel at my feet when told. I like a man with backbone.~~Dee

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