In the past four days since I began this blog, I have receive lots of email and questions. It is very gratifying because it shows interest and a need for a forum where women can accept themselves as sexual beings. The women that I have met during these past days give me new hope that one day there will be no need for the Sexual Rights that Charlie blogged so eloquently about because they will be naturally accepted into society by both women and men.
However…the trend that I find most disturbing as I stand here casting sexual pennies into the blogosphere fountain is the number of people who equate female sexuality with a hatred of men or the male population. As I try to wrap my mind around this concept to understand “where did that come from?,” I have decided to temporarily free myself from the bondage of rose colored glasses and move on to enlightening the population at large on a few salient points.
- First, I completely accept all things sexual…to me…to others. If you are not hurting another life form (and I am careful about my terms here because I am aware that there are many flavors of sexuality under the stars) and all parties are adults consensually engaging in adult activities, then you are all good with me. Just be sure to clean up when you are done! EWWWW…nuff’ said! <smile>
- Second, I have never in my life hated men. Quite the opposite is true. I have been lucky enough to know a few strong women and none of them hated men. Now…on this point, let’s be really clear! Each one of these women would in no way put up with any type of BS from a man, but, in all fairness, they would not put up with that same behavior from another woman. So, it’s not really personal. It is a natural respect translated into an unwillingness to be treated in away that is not stimulating to self or sexuality.
- Third….AND HERE IS THE BIGGY….acceptance as a sexually strong, powerful woman has NOTHING to do with men at all. When you claim your God given right to be a sexual being, you name your right to exist in your own skin. It is about gaining the confidence and the strength that empowers you to stand taller and know your own value. To bring passion into your life in ways you did not realized existed.
I have to give credit to men. They do this well…you don’t see them ducking there heads or shuffling their feet at the mere mention of sex. My belief is that our society teaches them to be sexually aware and autonomous better than it does women. Again…that is another blog.
The important thing here is the realization that the power a woman gains through grasping her sexuality with both hands and digging in her high heels in stern refusal to surrender her erotic being does not mean she has given up the pleasures of men. Quite the opposite might be true. It might mean that she will learn to enjoy those pleasures more fully and seek out places in her soul where passions have been hidden for years.
The empowerment of achieving sexual acceptance has nothing to do with anyone else around you. It happens all alone when you look in the mirror and feel for the first time that you are worthy of having the passions you deserve in your life. It means that you accept all of the responsibilities and privileges of being a woman when you decide not to “just lay there and pretend you like it.” You go from watching from the sidelines to actually participating in the game…by yourself or with a partner of your choice. But, either way, it does not bring hatred or dislike with it for another gender or sexuality. Only sweet freedom.
Additional words in after thought–I believe it is the perception that woman will be viewed as “Man Hating Bitches” if they are strong enough to embrace their sexual side. In their defense, I have more than once heard a sexually strong woman called a bitch (or a number of other things). What I really want to get across is dont play a labels game. Someone is always waiting to slap a label on you. That is life and the way humanity “deals” with things they dont understand. Define yourself…claim it, name it, own it! It has nothing at all to do with what others think around you and everything to do with what you think when you look in the mirror!
Something to Consider: I recently read a study that said 52% of women would give up sex before chocolate! Want to guess how many men would give up sex (without being dead)? When I smiling related this fact to my hubby, I boasted that I would take him (repeated!) over chocolate any day. He laughed and said…”I just thank God no one asked you about shoes or sex!” Now…while he is quite right, I do LOVE shoes (and chocolate)….I have about 30 pairs of high heel shoes….and only one man in my life! Not a coincidence.
Questions, Comments, Emotional Outburst? Ready? Set? Go!~~Dee